Passion – An observation

Passion takes so many forms in Italy and is displayed in various ways that, perhaps to the more conservative nations, may seem a little shocking, coquette, embarrassing, cheeky or just downright ‘get a room’ rude.

But the simple fact is Italians throw passion at absolutely everything, and it shows.  Well not exactly everything, try getting a house built with any great speed here, or get the post office staff to work a second past knock off time.  

It seems in Italy their thought process about this topic is ‘a sad state of affairs if people think this open passion is wrong when it should be something to be embraced’.

I’m talking about passion like:

• Mamma in her kitchen. Cooking the best and most loved family recipes she knows how with the freshest of ingredients, for a family she would do absolutely anything for. Food made with love and shared with love can’t help but taste like love (add a little bit of the OMG so delectable ‘truffle infused extra virgin olive oil’, and the people will probably end up making love right after dinner!) Males and Females of all ages always, always talk so very proudly about how good their Mamma’s cooking is, how each Mamma is ‘the best at this recipe’ or makes the region’s most sought after oil or pasta. The love of Mamma’s in this country surpasses religion. It’s a religion in itself. No one would ever leave this church!

• Passion for speed and being the first at anything. Don’t go thinking anyone is going to stand patiently in line in this here country, ooooooh no siree, it’s first in and best dressed to the finish line thank you very much. I had the insane pleasure of observing on more than one occasion the spectacle that is a bunch of school kids absolutely murder the bus door to be first on and get a seat, pushing and tearing their way through their friends with the best form of ‘netball elbows’ I have ever seen. Never mind that there may be an older person that might have to stand, or tourists with massive bags that are hauled onto the bus, barely fitting though the doors and having to squeeze into the already full aisle of school kids and their bags. None of them will move. They got there first damn-it, they won, and they get the trophy …. thanks for coming. This also goes for trains or buses. For example, waiting for a bus to go out and about in Tuscany. Everyone has had to book in advance and all seats are pre-allocated. The tourists are always first at the stop and line up in an orderly fashion and wait patiently for the bus to arrive. Then, at the last minute the locals rock up, stand in front of the tourists or anywhere really that takes their pleasure, and when the bus turns up and opens it’s doors, it hell for leather again to be the first one on the bus and get a seat. Don’t even think that just because you have been waiting for 20 minutes gives you any right to get on first…Nuh Aaaah…… Um, did I mention all seats were pre-allocated? Yet still their insane need to be first on and exactly where they want to be on the bus is abundantly clear. And boy, don’t even THINK of telling some old lady who has also pushed past you, that she is in your allocated seat… Oh Dio Mio… bad move lady, now the whole bus gets to hear what an awful tragedy it is that this old lady now has to get up out of the seat, and move somewhere else, don’t you know she needed to be at the very front so she can see as her sight is going, she has a bad back and a cold and her mothers-uncles-daughters-son is waiting for her at the other end of the trip?  Why can’t the person asking the questions move, this is a travesty… oh Dio, Mamma Mia! This was my experience as was the idiot who asked her to move. My initial shock with this sort of behavior from when I first arrived till now (two months later) is different. I now sit back and watch the circus which never fails to deliver smirks and smiles, and just recounting these stories makes me laugh at the drama of it all.

•  The Italian love of cars is evident, they have one of the most famous and sought after brands and they know it and push it. Men need to prove their ‘Descendant of Roman God-li-ness’ by showing how fast they can drive, even if they are in an ancient Fiat CinqueCento (Fiat 500), it’s something I don’t yet fully comprehend and somehow, I don’t think I ever will. I just need to accept that they are all mad drivers and they just like to go really REALLY fast.

• Passion to look good.  Well how can they not with brands such as Valentino, Versace, Armani, Prada all delivering quality chique that these women all seem to drip in.  Italian women are born with a sense of style, I don’t think it’s something that can really be taught. I know I certainly don’t have it, but even with the influences of music, art and movies to name a few, the women just have it and get it, and it’s a bit more out there and funkier than the French style. They dress to kill, ‘to see and be seen’ – that’s the end game here folks.  Don’t event think of competing, they will out-dress, out-heel and out-accessorise you to the death.

• Passion for family and friends.  Family is so very important here and one of the most sacred things in Italy. I read once that some Italians feel like family is more of a burden, that you feel obliged to go to all the cousins weddings, Nonna’s great friends’ husbands great nephew’s first communion, the guilt of the whole thing and the wrath if you don’t turn up. However, observing and talking to lots of locals over the last 6 weeks has given a different perspective, of tradition, pride in the family, of being there through thick and thin, living with the family sometimes through to the early thirties or until they get married…(more to do with funds than anything else, and secretly the Mamma’s want to hold onto their kids for as long as possible.) and let’s face it, if you had your clothes washed, ironed, all meals freshly cooked, no rent, no bills…. Would that tempt you? In any case, Italians are dedicated to their family, and friends are the extra support unit. They spend most of their time with one or the other, and it is not unheard of for someone to drive 200km’s on a Sunday to go to Nonna’s for the family Sunday Lunch, then drive home again.  It’s just what they do, and it’s wonderful to observe.

• Passion for L’Amore. Aaaah L’amore (l’ah-more-eh).  Seeing two people waiting to the death for a bus or train to leave, embracing as if the world will fall apart should they let go, and just as the whistle sounds and the doors slowly start to close, that last passionate kiss before diving for the steps, still watching, waving, blowing kisses, until their loved one is but a mere dot in the distance. That is love. That is passion. Why shouldn’t people be so openly in admiration of their loved one? Stopping mid stroll, in the middle of the footpath, oblivious that all behind them need to now get around them, to kiss, to embrace and to say.. It’s you that I love.

• On the flip side of the l’amore story is when a ‘lovers tiff ‘is played out in public. Whoa Boy, strap on your seat belts folks and enjoy the circus, because it’s on for young and old. A lot of Italians smile as they walk past one of these… I have encountered three of them. Maybe they have done this in the past and realise what a goose they looked like. Maybe they loved the attention, and making up afterwards… aaaah, maybe that’s what that cheeky smile means, you sneaky man. I don’t understand a single word (they are talking too quickly for me to get a single word) but I love watching this Italian fascination of letting the whole world know your love life woes.  I think the British people would need years of therapy and cups of tea if this was the norm in the UK!

So what does this mean?

Did I notice all this before on my previous visits? I can’t recall but not going hell for leather, 5 countries in 10 days could well be helping these observations.

I thoroughly recommend doing one or two countries or regions and doing them well. To get to know a country, it’s people, it’s culture and what makes it tick, delivers far greater merit and reward than you can imagine.  Discovering even just a little of what makes a country so attractive and intriguing to the rest of the world, whilst trying to live their lifestyle, even if just for a few weeks, is an incredible experience.

Seeing all these actions and behaviors that you know you will never understand or see anywhere but abroad has an irresistible pull, that just keeps drawing us back time and time again.

And for very god reason. 

Travel is the best.